Thinking_Feeling_UnderstandingAs the narcissistic sociopath ages, his mask becomes more transparent, easier to see through. Why? His circle of friends has diminished significantly. Possibly as few as one. There are no “old” friends remaining. Even his family has distanced themselves. When he does meet new people, he’s desperate for immediate acceptance in order to begin his manipulations and be provided with fresh narcissistic supply.

A new victim must wonder, “Why does this great guy have no friends? How could one person have such bad luck with people?”

Hopefully, the new victim will not say, “I can fix him. I can make his life better.” Hopefully, the new victim will see these questions and concerns as red flags that this “great guy” ain’t so great. This “great guy” shit on people. This “great guy” doesn’t have friends because no one likes being around him. And for VERY good reasons.

His charm is worn. His jokes (the same racist and sexist jokes he’s been telling for eons) aren’t funny. His repeated jabs at people’s clothes, cars, homes, jobs, and even their children are indicative of his own hatred for himself. His heart is dark and closed.

Would you be proud to call such an asshole your son? Then why would you want to call him your boyfriend, husband, or father of your children? You wouldn’t. No one would.

Time is not on the narcissistic sociopath’s side. (Cue the violins!) But time IS on our side, the side of good people who are interested in living and loving other good people.

Vow this New Year’s 2013 to nurture the goodness that exists in you. Vow to do good deeds for yourself and others every day. It could be as simple as listening to someone who is struggling and saying, “I understand.” You have no idea how much those two simple words can help transform a person’s outlook.

Happy New Year! Peace! Namaste!

abuse, Cluster B disorders, domestic violence, Emotional Abuse, Family, Health, Lessons, Love, Mental Health, Narcissist, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, NPD, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, Psychopaths, PTSD, Relationships, Self Improvement, Sociopaths, Spirituality
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Join the conversation! 17 Comments

  1. Very, very true! A good description of my ex-narcissist.


  2. Reblogged this on safegirl and commented:
    Thanks Paula!


  3. Reblogged this on ronald scott ippolito.


  4. Paula, I am behind you 100% in your effort to educate the world about sociopaths and the havoc they wreak on their own flesh and blood. My sociopath had a mother who was a convicted felon and I never put the pieces together during 24 years of marriage. It was only when I filed for divorce that the monster turned on me and I saw his true colors come out. His behavior was so outrageous that I felt as if I was living in an Alfred Hitchcock film. My attorneys never “got it” and I believe to this day believe that we are two high conflict people getting a divorce. Their ignorance caused me a tremendous amount of stress and suffering during this process. However, no matter what, I never have to live with him again. Thank you for blogging so that we can all support one another!


    • Thank you for commenting and supporting what I do along with the many readers and bloggers here who also share and comment. The world is blind to these crazy-making people. I am glad you were finally able to free yourself from him and his family. We know the difference between being angry and upset vs. being narcissistic/sociopathic, don’t we? I wish the rest of the planet would get up to speed. 🙂


  5. Happy New Year to you Paula and thank you for the work you are doing for others.
    God bless


  6. Happy New Year Paula!


  7. the father has had many leave is life over the years, as a kid i always wondered why, i thought it had to do with me, now i know.


    excellent insights! I have found this to be very true,

    as in my own case with my NS who happens to be a sibling placed into adoption, then found/reunioned. After abuse from her and decades of ‘no contact’ she comes back into our lives with a libelous book. Her reaction to our anger and outrage, was to ATTACK us with a vengeance and with an army of friends. In a period of 3 years, while she may have ‘friends’ they stay in the background, for they no longer can ‘fight’ our TRUTH; we have bested them all. The only friend she has left is an idiot boyfriend who’s own behavior shows that he is a victim himself of the NS that tells him want she wants him to do…go and browbeat and bully WOMEN (that he doesn’t know), strictly on order of her (the NS) who says ‘go and get my birth siblings’.

    Pity is…these individuals haven’t a clue that they are aging…not really…aging appears SUDDENLY, and if you are NOT aware of that fact, and don’t live rightly and gracefully…the end stages are not pretty…they will be totally alone and with nothing to show for their life span! Their death beds will have no one there to hold their hand!


  9. I WAS the new victim who said yes, I could make his life better! He convinced me, alright. I also at the same time was saying to myself, why doesn’t this person have ANY friends except this one (who, by the way, is also no longer his friend but mine now, as we sort out the lies and incredible deceit) . And why was his family so distant? Three grown children who never call, write, or visit?

    Oh, Paula you have again described pretty much word for word this aging sociopath. I’m out! I’m free! I never again have to listen to the constant and persistent degradation of aspect of every walking breathing other human being. You are so beautifully right that time is on our side to connect with others in a nurturing, life giving, whole and holy way, as you are doing here with me and us! Thank YOU for saying “I Understand.” It does help so so much. Happy Happy New Year and blessings for this new and joyful life.


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