Much to the detriment of our health, wealth, love, and relationships, most of us confuse SURVIVING trauma with HEALING from trauma.
They are NOT the same thing. Just because you survived abuse, an ambush, an unfortunate accident, a health crisis and/or loss of a loved one, etc. doesn’t mean you are healed.
Surviving something happens in a split second. You’re heart is still beating. Yeyy!
Healing from something requires time, deliberate attention, more time, tests, more attention, more tests, more time…ad nauseam until you pass the test without the need for a reward.
Just surviving often means a lifetime of pain, regret, shame, and blame that leads to failed attempts at relationships, loss of career aspirations, more sickness, and more trauma piling on top of the rest of the unhealed and unresolved trauma that paved a path to the new traumas.
I’ve been trapped in that vicious cycle believing everything bad that happened to me was my fault and that I wasn’t worthy of better. And while sitting in that mindset, I attracted lots and lots of people who sat in that mindset, too. Inevitably, we collectively created unhealthy bonds and experiences together. We didn’t intend to keep hurting ourselves and traumatizing each other. It was the energy and vibration of our mindset, beliefs, and fears that created those traumas.
Everything “bad” started with our subconscious beliefs that bad stuff begets more bad stuff.
“Oh, well. May as well make the most of it. Everyone else does!”
No. Not everyone just sits there and takes it. You don’t have to either. But the alternative requires you to accept one thing:
“I am 100% accountable for how I reacted to the trauma of my past.”
After accepting that one very important thing, you must then choose to believe one thing:
“I’m worthy and deserve better.”
Not everyone is going to agree with you because most people think they’re worthless. They think this subconsciously. No one is going to ever admit they think this way. Heck no! But if you find it hard to say those words out loud without feeling like you’re acting too proud and arrogant and what will people think, then you, too, think you’re worthless.
Healing begins by valuing your worth. Otherwise, you’re not going to heal and become a better and different version of yourself.
Think about a time you were physically injured and healed quickly. I guarantee there was a doctor, nurse, or parent close by tending to you. Someone other than yourself who valued you and knew you could get well.
This was your RECOVERY CAPITAL. And just like healing from a physical injury, you must allow and seek out recovery capital for your emotional injuries, too.
Examples of RECOVERY CAPITAL include:
Close friends
Support groups
Clergy
Employee assistance programs
Community events
Family
Counseling, therapy, etc.
More importantly, YOU are your biggest asset when it comes to your recovery capital. Without YOU supporting YOU, no amount of money, friends, or group support is going to matter.
Allow yourself the grace to ACCEPT whatever happened up to this point in your life. Your acceptance will open doors to self-forgiveness, which opens doors to a type of healing you never knew existed.
People will suddenly start crossing your path at just the right moment and share experiences and stories that immediately resonate with you.
“Oh, wow! How did you know I needed to hear that?”
They didn’t know; you did. You subconsciously asked for everything you needed to know so you could finally heal and not just survive.
Your Healing Frequency 