“Dear” by Patricia Ferland Weltin

“Dear”
by Patricia Ferland Weltin

Dear Heartbreaker
Dear Money Taker
Dear Family Court Faker

I’m still here!

Dear Soul Sucker
Dear Other Woman Fucker
Dear Every Rule Bucker

I’m still here!

Dear Dead Beat Dad
Dear Need the Latest Fad
Dear Think it’s Cool to Be Bad

I’m still here!

Dear Child User
Dear Legal System Abuser
Dear Too Many Women Chooser

I’m still here!

Dear Effortless Liar
Dear Relentless Denier
Dear Crocodile Crier

I’m still here!

Dear Identity Stealer
Dear Mind Game Dealer
Dear Pretend to Be Healer

I’m still here!

Dear Creator of Confusion
Dear Master of Illusion
Dear Reality is Delusion

I’m still here!

Dear Master of Submit
Dear Force Feeder of Shit
Dear A Dozen Ways to Get Lit

I’m still here!

Dear User of Force
Dear Creator of Loss
Dear Raper and Boss

I’m still here
and it’s important you know Dear
YOU can’t make me disappear.

Anti-Ode to The Sociopath

brokenwingOh, you despicable sociopath,
Sitting upon your throne of nothingness;
Can you hear their voices echoing in your head?
“You never loved us; you loved the idea of us. There is a difference. And you don’t love the one you’re with now, either.”

You are deaf.

Oh, you pathetic sociopath,
Thinking upon your empty heart;
Can you see each of your “soul mates” running away from you over and over again in your mind?
“You were never our soul mate. A soul mate wouldn’t repel us nor make us feel unworthy of love and understanding.”

You are blind.

Oh, you sad and soulless sociopath,
Resting on a pillow of empty morals;
Can you read the minds of the people who simply tolerate you?
“We call you Darth Vader behind your back. Do you realize that? You’re the butt of our jokes.”

You are dumb.

Oh, you conscienceless and self-righteous sociopath.
The only fool getting in your way is the one staring back at you in the muddy puddle of your reflection you continuously attempt to avoid.

Step in it, Dear Sociopath. You may be surprised by what’s gasping for breath just beneath the surface.

Image and Poem © 2013 Paula Carrasquillo and Paula’s Pontifications

Free and beautiful

A reader’s words to “her” sociopath

Free and beautiful

Words to the Sociopath

With your boyish charm you stole my heart,
took my breath, enchanted my mind.
Then the mask fell leaving me bewildered.

The cruel words that spewed from lips I once cherished were meant to crush my spirit.

My heart now has surfaced from the black depths.
Layers of your negativity peeled from my heart.

I breathe.
I breathe freedom.
I breathe peace.

I wake each morning to the power within myself to live my life beautiful.
Destroy my esteem you didn’t.
 
I am stronger than before.
I am beautiful.
I am FREE.

Lorrie Lawson, April 2013

(Image credit: Vajarto Wallpaper)

Writing keeps us sane and healthy…Really!

People often ask me, “Why do you write about such personal things on your blog and on your other site? Aren’t you afraid of being judged or critisized?”

My quick answer: Writing provides me with a release. Instead of trying to fight feelings internally, I purge them by writing them all down and sharing some of them on my blog. Some feelings are shameful, and some are joyful. I publish many of these feelings because I know there might be others who have similar feelings and think they are alone in those feelings. (You know how they say misery loves company? Well, I like to think that all emotions and feelings want company. When we’re joyful, wouldn’t we rather be in a room filled with other happy folks than a room filled with depressed downers?)

If you don’t believe me, read what the experts have to say about writing and healing.

When I was pregnant with my son in 2005, I took two creative writing courses. Most of the stuff I wrote about dealt with overwhelming emotions and moods I was experiencing. At the time, I had no idea that the process of writing was aiding me through these moods as my pregnancy progressed. I would have strong feelings of not being worthy of having a child or not knowing how to be a good mother or wife or sister…(you get the idea). Here is a poem I wrote inspired by William Carlos Williams’ poem of the same title:

This is Just to Say
(April 2005 – For my husband, sister, and baby)

This is just to say…
I’m sorry for eating your food
from the Styrofoam container clearly marked:
“Please Do Not Eat.”

This is just to say…
I’m sorry for being cranky and tired lately
but you’d be too if you
had a grapefruit poking out of your belly.

This is just to say…
I’m sorry I forgot to put a new roll
of toilet paper in the bathroom;
I know you can’t see without your glasses.

This is just to say…
I hope your team wins; I really
do care even though I always say:
“It’s ONLY a game.”

This is just to say…
I hope you decide to stay;
We really love having you around even though
you don’t help cook, clean, or walk your dog.

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