Lazy Brain and the Narcissistic Sociopath

Lazy Loser Brains Paula Carrasquillo

Somewhere along the path of development, a narcissistic sociopath‘s brain ceases to grow. Instead of the circuitry inside his brain getting excited about learning something new and solving a problem in a new and different way, the circuitry opts out.

“Abort! Abort! This one is too tough to solve. Just keep doing what we always do: cry, pout, blame and run away. It works so well.”

And the sociopath’s brain keeps doing this — sending the same message. As a result, the sociopath continues to cry, pout, blame and run away regardless of age. This childish behavior is one of the reasons why so many victims initially blame his inability to communicate effectively and come to collaborative resolutions on, what they deduce and assume to be, the sociopath’s lack of life experiences. Victims assume the sociopath is so rigid in his thinking because he has never been in a situation where he has had to consider another person or a group of people. And because we are empathetic, we set aside our frustrations, and instead, we feel pity for these people who seem to have been living in a protective bubble their entire lives.

(Strike one against us and our so-called advanced cognitive thinking skills!)

After all, the rest of us (who are not pathological) experience the growing pains of our teenage years with complete immersion and energy and gusto. Our brains work overtime. We cry and battle ourselves and other teenagers and our parents. But we learn valuable lessons about respect and empathy and how to treat others as we wish to be treated. As teenagers, we experience a level of cognitive development that is so high and constant that it sometimes makes us feel like we’re losing our minds. And in a way we are. We are losing the primitive thinking patterns that guided us as infants, toddlers and children. Our brain’s cognitive development during our teenage years is life-changing. It’s a rite of passage. Once reached we are thrust head-first into adulthood and feeling empowered with the necessary brain power and thinking skills to help us take on all of the responsibilities associated with being productive, loving and kind.

The sociopath does not attain a rite of passage like the rest of us. He cheats his way into adulthood, because the sociopath spends his teenage years regressing mentally and emotionally. All problems are solved by rebelling but never facing the consequences of those rebellions. Someone is always there bailing him out and telling him it was someone else’s fault and not to worry. This “bailout” sends the message to the sociopath’s brain that says, “You don’t have to change, man. Look how easy it is to keep being an infant and toddler and manipulating everyone around you so you can have your own way in the end? Why learn how to think beyond your primitive brain? Why bother? Why be accountable? Relax. Sit back. Enjoy the ride.”

And that message keeps getting sent, which results in the sociopath’s increased feelings of entitlement and lazy, lazy thinking.

Entitlement and lazy thinking leads to lazy work ethic (or no work ethic). Many sociopaths who do not have degrees or who barely graduated high school will tell you that their life experiences make up for their lack of education. They will even go as far as putting down those with degrees and declaring them as being sheep easily manipulated and trained.

When and if you hear this, think “splitting.” This is a great example of their black and white thinking. All good and all bad. I’ve met some lazy thinkers with degrees, but also some of the most intelligent people I have met in this world do not have a college education. They are also not sociopaths. To me, if you’re going to claim your life experiences make up for any formal education you could have pursued, show me. Talk to me. Tell me what you’re passionate about and why. Sociopath’s can’t show you beyond the passion and lust they have for material possessions, and that’s just sad to me.

With his perpetual lazy thinking and entitlement, the sociopath continues living in his protective bubble of ignorance and inability to discover any real passion other than a passion for conning and abusing people and situations.

And if you start questioning the sociopath’s con, his brain will send that same and comforting message to him:

“Abort! Abort! This one is too tough to manipulate. Just keep doing what you’ve always done: cry, pout, blame and run away.”

When and if your relationship with a sociopath ends, remember that they can’t help themselves and they will never change. It’s impossible to reprogram something with defective parts no matter how much cognitive-behavioral therapy you thrust upon the sociopath. You might THINK the glitch has been fixed, but the machine has a memory, and the glitch is too comfortable and too familiar to be considered a true glitch to the machine. The machine misses the glitch and will inevitably seek out that place of comfort, like a baby seeking a nipple.

The abuse and con games never end.

Unless the sociopath has committed a prosecutable offense against you or a loved one, let the sociopath go in peace so you can find your peace. It’s better this way.

Namaste!

The twisted cognitive thinking skills of the narcissistic sociopath

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Learning is a complex process that requires constant attention and nurturing. As we grow, our learning either improves, stagnates, or deteriorates. We could have been great learners as children but lack the ability to process information and comprehend new information as adults. Why does this happen? How does this happen?

For some reason, some of us lose our motivation to learn. Our cognitive skills flounder and we become less effective in the following interdependent areas of cognition:

  • Attention (sustained, selective, and divided attentions)
  • Working memory (retaining information for short periods of time)
  • Processing Speed (the rate at which our brain handles information)
  • Long-Term Memory (restore and recall information for later use)
  • Visual processing (perceive, analyze, and think in visual images)
  • Auditory Processing (perceive, analyze, and conceptualize what is heard)
  • Logic and Reasoning (reason, prioritize, and plan)

When one area of cognition fails to grow and be nurtured, all areas of cognition are affected. More frightening, if one cognitive area is manipulated in such a way to cause false interpretations and analysis, the other cognitive areas will fail and become distorted. A perfect example is the criminal mind and that of the narcissistic sociopath.

The criminal and the narcissistic sociopath (often one and the same), successfully ignore visual and auditory cues and distort all logic and reasoning rendering their remaining cognitive skills useless and ineffective. All interpersonal communication becomes twisted, and the opportunity to build a healthy relationship with a narcissistic sociopath is a pipe dream.

For example, you arrive home from work to discuss a work-related issue that has you worried. You want and need some basic love and support. You explain to your intimate partner/spouse that you feel like you’ve been taken advantage of and that your co-worker took your ideas and claimed them as his own. You expect your partner/spouse to use your visual and auditory cues to see how sad and frustrated you are. You also expect your partner/spouse to remember past conversations you had shared related to this particular co-worker. But your partner fails you because he fails himself and misinterprets everything either by accident or on purpose.

Instead of your partner saying something useful and constructive to you like:

“Oh, it will be okay. Why don’t I take you out to dinner so you can relax and try to forget about your frustrating day.”

Your partner says something uncaring and destructive like:

“What did you do that would have made him take your idea and use it for himself? Did you piss him off?”

The first sentence is a statement that implies he was listening to you and watching you in hopes of comforting you with a response. That’s what loving couples do. They help ease each other’s worries.

The second sentence consists of two accusatory questions that would lead anyone to think their partner/spouse doesn’t really care if you are put at ease. The second sentence implies he’d rather see you suffer and get more upset with the situation.

His ineffective (or effective depending on his motivation) cognitive skills are putting you on the defensive. Relationships are not supposed to do that. A relationship isn’t a court of law. A successful relationship requires healthy communication skills. Healthy communication skills require sane and healthy cognitive thinking from both.

You make an attempt to answer the questions without being defensive. You say something like:

“Of course not. I do my work and try to collaborate when collaboration is necessary. I would never steal someone else’s ideas. That’s not right.”

Then your partner says something like this:

“You obviously did something that pissed him off.”

This finally puts you on the defensive and you repeatedly explain that you did nothing. Your partner repeatedly counters you and says you must have. It all spirals into a shitty conversation because the narcissist is projecting and you have no idea that sick people do this in hopes of making others feel sick, too.

If you had the same sick and twisted cognitive thinking skills as the narcissistic sociopath, you would ask him:

“Is that what you do narc? Piss people off on purpose so they’ll steal your ideas and give you a reason to bitch? To me, that’s going out of your way to invite unnecessary drama into your life. It seems a little stupid to me.”

The narcissistic sociopath’s illogical thinking doesn’t work in reverse, does it? The next time one of them starts frustrating you with their illogical thinking, reverse the argument. Project it back at them. But be careful. You might get thrown out of the house or called a whore for pointing the ugliness back in their direction.

Narcissistic sociopaths do not think cognitively the way the rest of us do. What is logical and reasonable to us, is the absolute opposite to them. It’s one of the reasons healthy people get so frustrated and confused by narcissistic sociopaths. We would never consider making someone angrier or more upset to be a good idea. To the narcissistic sociopath, making someone more angry and more upset is their goal in life. Losers.

Namaste!

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