Domestic violence abusers and Lance Armstrong

lance armstrong meddling kidsThe next time someone asks you why you stayed in an abusive relationship for so long, ask them why it took the world over a decade to finally realize Lance Armstrong was a cheating doper. Some people won’t like this post. I take that back. MANY people won’t like this post. How can I compare Lance Armstrong to domestic violence and abusers? Easy.

Abusers don’t start hurting us the day we accept our first date with them. Many abusers don’t start abusing their victims until they are certain their victims have “bought” their con. The con is that the abuser is our soul mate and will love you and only you forever. The abuser is the best you have ever had and that without the abuser, you will suffer. The abuser gains our pity and sympathy. He was a victim of abuse himself or endured a challenging childhood or agonizing first marriage or divorce. Whatever it was the abuser endured, he over came it because he is powerful and strong and a superman. The abuse he inflicts on you is because he is afraid of losing you. He can’t help himself. He’s so scared. You forgive him over and over and over again. Until, finally, one day you wake up and say to yourself, “I won’t take this anymore! I am worth so much more than this lying, abusive, asshole. I don’t care what he endured. I won’t be his victim anymore.”

Lance Armstrong created his mask, his con, too. He is a cancer survivor. He is a hard-working athlete. He’s a family man who froze his sperm before chemotherapy in order  to have children! He won the hearts of many and motivated many cancer patients to keep fighting.

Since the first cheating accusations, Lance has proclaimed his innocence and everyone (most everyone) believed him or were at least left with enough doubt that they refused to believe such a man of strength and integrity could do such a thing. No one could fathom that a hero would lie through his teeth to cover up the truth. After all, if it were true, he’d eventually crack under the pressure, right? No one can lie for as long as the dope testers claim he has lied, right?

(Victims of domestic violence know differently. We know there are people who will lie and blame others for their bad behavior. We know it’s possible for abusers to maintain their lies and the mask of innocence forever, even if faced with images of their battered victims.)

Lance proclaimed his innocence for over a decade. But now we have been provided with an extensive report explaining how he passed all of those drug tests. Now we know how he bullied many into keeping their mouths shut, or else. This was an elaborate con with many players and A LOT of money exchanging hands. He abused the trust of all of his fans, cancer researchers, cancer survivors, and MANY good people who put their trust in Livestrong because Lance projected his “man of steel” reputation onto the Foundation. Livestrong WAS Lance. Lance WAS Livestrong.

Lance will never admit he cheated; there is too much money and “stuff” at stake. Are we really that stupid to believe that a drug-free Lance Armstrong won the Tour de France 7 times against every top rider who admitted to cheating?!?!  There are many who still believe he is superman and innocent and a victim of a witch hunt. I, for one, think he’s a lying cheater and a textbook narcissist. How he handles the ensuing backlash will help determine if he is also a sociopath. Look for the pity party and the blame game and whether he “gifts” his new wife with many of his assets. He may even divorce her to protect his “stuff.”

He could have been a true hero to many, but his greedy nature took him to a place good people wouldn’t even consider going. Like all abusers, he has zero remorse or accountability. It’s our fault for believing their con in the first place, right? Silly us. We asked for it.

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