About Paula

Becky, Rachael, Paula and Caroline

Paula and her sisters on her 8th birthday in 1980.

Paula Carrasquillo, M.A. lives and works in the Washington, D.C. area. She holds a master’s degree in Communication and Adult Education and a bachelor’s degree in English. Paula is currently enrolled in a 200-hour yoga teacher training program and hopes to be certified in July 2014. Her next book, “Embracing Your Light: Mindful Healing and recovery from Sociopath Abuse,” will be available by the end of 2014.

“I read A LOT and do yoga for my physical and mental well being. My husband and child are my best friends and everything I do to improve myself can only make my bond with them even stronger. By no means is my life rainbows and butterflies. We all have obstacles and challenges in our lives. My hope is that I grow and learn from them. I am a believer that life dishes out only what we can handle and every experience can change us for good or bad, better or worse; it is up to each of us to choose.”

You can read more about Paula’s projects, career experiences, and personal interests on her Personal and VERY Public Website.

©Paula Carrasquillo and Paula’s Pontifications, 2012 – 2014. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Paula Carrasquillo and Paula’s Pontifications with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Join the conversation! 45 Comments

  1. Hi Paula.

    You’re an eloquent, inspiring writer and I believe you are doing great things in the fight against domestic abuse in particular. For that reason, I’ve nominated you for the Sunshine Award! More details about the award here: http://avalancheofthesoul.wordpress.com/2014/02/08/sunshine-award/

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  2. I found your blog through Madeline Scribes. Great blog! 🙂

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  3. […] found Paula’s Pontifications when I was writing my chapter story entitled Insanity. Reading her words was like hearing from a […]

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  4. […] Carasquillo, creator of the blog Paula’s Pontifications which deals primarily with sociopaths wrote a blog which led me to discovering a video which […]

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  5. I just discovered your blog, and am looking forward to following your posts! I too am writing about learning from life’s challenges, and using negative/difficult experiences to make the most out of life! You have a beautiful style of writing. Take care!

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  6. I found your web-site today and just wanted to thank you for your insight. After a lifetime of dealing with the psychopaths in my life, I still struggle to wrap my head around the abuse.

    Great web-site.

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    • Thank you, C.C. I don’t think any of us ever truly wrap our heads around the chaos. But together we can accept it easier, grow, and move forward. 🙂

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  7. Life does seem to be dishing out a bit to much lately. I also am very interested in why some of us have PTSD and not others. Also why my 2 children are so narcissistic. It hurts so much inside that they are this way. Now today I received a death threat from my daughter. It seems to never end.

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    • The occurance of PTSD in some and not others who suffer trauma is something that I think about a lot. I also think that many of us bury the trauma so well, that we don’t experience the symptoms or effects of PTSD until many months or even years later. Our brains protect us like that. Perhaps it’s due to experiencing another trauma that causes our brains to recall past traumas. Who knows. But I believe it inevitably surfaces and many are left wondering why, after so many years, they are expereincing the anxieties and nightmares seemingly out of the blue. That’s why I feel it’s so important to be brave and face our experiences, good and bad, head on and not be afraid to tell ourselves and others how we feel.

      We want to be so strong and courageous and fix ourselves without burdening others. But sometimes we can’t help ourselves. We need to know when to reach out and ask for help.

      Have you read “Women who Love Psychopaths” by Sandra L. Brown? She touches on the “super traits” many of us possess that get us into predicaments with pathological people. The #1 trait, not surprisingly, is our empathy for others.

      Even receiving a death threat from your child makes you more worried about your child’s state-of-mind rather than your safety. A psychopath/sociopath/narcissist would report the death threat immediately because they have zero empathy or accountability or understadning of why a person they have harmed would wish them dead. I wished my ex dead many, many times. I’d like to see him ripped apart by wild animals, honestly, because that’s how he made me feel–like I was being ripped apart. I can laugh about it only because it’s my personal fantasy and wish. I realize it’s something that I envision to cope. He dies in these visions. Keeping it in my head is enough death and violence for me to handle.

      I hope you reported the threats, because pathological people WILL follow through if allowed or not challenged.

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  8. […] Red Riding Hood Project was originally launched in 2012 in the USA by Paula Carrasquillo, an author and campaigner to raise awareness of domestic abuse in North America. A survivor […]

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  9. Hi Paula I just nominated you for the first ever Missy Award.

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  10. hey Paula, here is my friends secret site, i have to tell people individually as he found me and the bullying has begun. can you pass it along to any who may be interested? http://bwitzwl.wordpress.com/about/

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  11. Hi Paula! I found your site through “One Hot Mess”. She’s awesome!
    I’m loving your blog, and can relate to much of what you share.

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  12. Could you please email me.

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  13. paula
    email me…;please…

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  14. Good blog. I read a few article and I will be reading more articles soon.
    http://andlifesmile.wordpress.com

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  15. Hi, Paula. I have nominated you for the Inspiring Blog and One Lovely Blog awards. Here: http://wp.me/p1jL9y-i9. You can pass the torch by giving me a shout-out, then stating 7 facts about yourself and nominating 15 bloggers whom you find inspiring or lovely. Or just skip it and post whatever you’d like. 🙂

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  16. Hi Paula,
    Maude called me last evening and I gave her the information to your Washington times column. Being a columnist herself she was very impressed. She expressed her pleasure in your success and good fortune.

    If I dress up this Halloween I am going as Little Red Ridinghood.

    Love you from the heart! Mom

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  17. […] AboutIdentifying a Narcissistic SociopathYoga & MeditationAbuseEmotional AbusePhysical Abuse […]

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  18. Ive downloaded Kindle onto my iPhone and downloaded your book and a few other books. You have opened my world to ebooks. Thank you! I dont know why I havent before. I really look forward to reading your book and find your blog very interesting. Kat 🙂

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  19. Hi Paula. Very important topic you’re taking on. Are you familiar with the field of Ponerology?

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    • I have only touched on it in some of my readings. I have been thinking about it in relation to the Penn State abuses, actually, and the evil behind it and how it is reminiscent of historical accounts of Nazi Germany control and manipulations, connections most won’t even consider fathoming because in trying to understand the motivation, one really must believe in evil. Not many people want to believe in evil. I do. I’ve seen it. Thank you for commenting. I am very interested in your site and the subject matter.

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  20. Do you know why i lived with Jane and Wayne when we were growing up? It’s funny how much we truly did not know about each other.

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    • Details! We didn’t need to know details in order to know we had a connection and could help each other then and into the future. I love you, Bernadette and that won’t change (unless you turn out to be some crazy lunatic who’s out to hurt me! Hahaha!) XOXO ~Paula

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  21. I sent you an email, Sorry I didn’t send it sooner,

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  22. Missed you too!

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  23. I’m back Paula. Lost myself for a couple months but I snapped out of it. I had to read your page again to re-group myself.

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  24. You are an amazing writer! To be able to put your experience into such incredible words.

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  25. Paula, are you a psychologist or psychology student? If so I’d like to pick your brain about aggression, violence, and psychopathy. I’m a neuroscience student interested in these things, particularly noting common neurobiological similarities in those who are particularly aggressive.

    Hope all is well,

    Jack Pemment

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    • Jack~
      I am neither a psychology/psychiatry professional nor student in the formal sense. I read extensively about psychopathy and violence as a direct result of my history and experience. I am trying to understand the effects of violence against adult victims (in particular, women) and why some and not others experience symptoms of PTSD. I wish I could be a better credible resource for you.
      ~Paula

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