Why are you so concerned about what the sociopath thinks of you?

Why does it matter to you, knowing what you know about sociopaths, if the sociopath likes you or not?

Personally, I would like for all sociopaths to meet me and instantly get repulsed.


If they liked me, I’d be open to becoming a potential victim.

But I’m not going to go out of my way to be unlikable just in case a sociopath crosses my path.

However, I will use my boundaries and practice saying “no” in all situations and all relationships.


Saying “no” is relatively harmless. Normal, non-sociopathic people might initially respond to your “no” with a grimace or two, but they’ll get over it and respect you in the end.

However, the least pleasant word to hit a sociopath’s ears is the word “no.” It’s the biggest red flag while the sociopath is assessing potential victims. The sociopath hears that word and immediately thinks, “What a piece of shit she is to say “no” to me! I’ll show her. I’m not going to be her friend.”

(Thank you, God!!)

Do you see how we can dodge these bullets, completely unaware, just by being true to ourselves, our interests, and our desires?

Putting yourself first by using your boundaries isn’t a selfish act; it’s a self-preserving and protective act.

So even though you let the sociopath from your past (and possibly still your present) walk all over your boundaries, you have the opportunity to build up and maintain those once crushed boundaries.

Start today. Start saying “no” when you really want to say “no.”

You want the sociopath to continue to think you suck. Really…You do.

Besides, once a sociopath thinks you suck, you’ll always suck in the eyes of a sociopath.

Even if you become Miss America, the next governor of your state, or a New York Times best selling author, the sociopath will STILL continue to smear you among his/her minions and all of the people once mutual in your inner circle while in the toxic relationship.

Don’t let the sociopath’s nonsense and refusal to evolve his/her mind stop you from finding and reaching your potential. Who cares what the sociopath thinks, right?

Be proud of your breakthroughs and accomplishments out of love and respect for yourself. You will never be able to change the sociopath’s ugly and dismissive opinion of you.

Keep saying “no” to the sociopath but “yes” to your own needs and dreams and wishes and goals!!


abuse, Cluster B disorders, domestic violence, Emotional Abuse, Family, Forgiveness, Friends, Health, Humor, Lessons, Love, Mental Health, mindfulness, Narcissist, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Narcissistic Sociopath, NPD, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, Psychopaths, PTSD, Rape, Recovery, Relationships, Self Improvement, Sociopaths, Spirituality
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Join the conversation! 14 Comments

  1. So right on point Paula!
    It doesn’t matter what they think or say because they are always smearing someone if it’s not at that moment.
    to Family Court victim – I feel for you! My ex’s lawyer is like my ex and the last judge we had in December was on my ex’s side.


  2. […] The sociopath thinks you suck? Good! Throw a party! […]


  3. We feel the same way. the more you say no to a sociopath the more focused you are on your own life. a sociopath wants to take every part of your life off of you, because they are so miserable with themselves.


  4. wow you are right on with this one. Why do we even care what they think about us? They have shown time and again they have no grip on reality. They are ridiculous in their perceptions and can’t be trusted. And, you really say it all when you point out it does not matter what you do- you could another Buddha – and still they will hate you. Love this one, Paula.


  5. Reblogged this on Parrots, Prose, and Poetry and commented:
    “No” is a complete sentence.


    • Saying ‘no’ to a sociopath is empowering to an empath. It must be frustrating to a sociopath. It’s rather like NO CONTACT – empowering to us, frustrating and irritating to them. When you mention their minions, Paula – once mutual friends – that is one thing I found very difficult for a long time. To slander the victim is vile. But, eventually it can be overcome by NO CONTACT with them as well. It is, in fact, doubly-empowering to the empath in that the sociopath cannot find out how our lives are going through their minions. I also ‘unfriended’ him on Facebook and no longer post anything on there. He calls my number (sometimes at 3 am) and I don’t answer. It’s the only way to move forward for me in order to concentrate on myself, my family and my friends and to realise my dreams!


    • I blocked my ex on FB, as well as mutual “friends” of ours. He cannot call or text me as his number is blocked. I have no contact with him. It’s the only way to heal and move on. I’ve tried the other way. It DOES NOT work.


  6. Thank you, God. Thank you, Paula. Thank you, Internet. I so needed to read this! Transforming from a “yes” person (who became a doormat) to a “no” person with healthy boundaries is not easy. Your message really resonated with me. This dose of strength and validation is just what I needed. I will re-read often until saying “no” becomes natural, comfortable and guilt-free for me. Love you, Paula! Thank you for sharing your wisdom.


  7. Reblogged this on Family Court Victim: The War on Women and commented:
    So true. Love validation.


  8. You should see the latest email I got from my (h)ex who I pay child support to and am the sole coverer of our daughter’s health insurance about how irresponsible I am. He even added: “But in due time, you will get what you’ve got coming.”


    • It’s truly despicable how they try perpetuating control over our emotions even outside the relationship. And they succeed until we finally say “enough” and let go of caring about what they think of us. Why do we care what an ugly human being thinks of us? Ugly, ugly, ugly!! We should not care. When we do, all if our decisions are controlled by them!! And as a mother, your children deserve you to be happy and in control of yourself and your inner voice. 🙂


    • His emails remind me so much of my ex-husbands. Scary how they are all so similar. Demeaning. Controlling. Vindictive. Ugh. Sadly, my Judge is as demeaning as my ex-husband. I guess my ex being a cop and him being a Judge = similar personality traits. They seem like BFFs in the court room. It is truly disgusting.


    • Some judges probably tend to have controlling traits…some judges (& DAs) make ruling that suggest they are molesters as well


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