Happiness Meme

(I came upon this meme yesterday while surfing about Facebook. It provoked a small reaction I shared on my Facebook page and I wanted to share it here.)

Sociopaths ruin our happiness just by interjecting themselves into our lives.

Did anyone seek out the sociopath? I doubt it! More than likely you were secretly stalked like me and then swooped down upon and “captured” in the sociopath’s net.

They are shit people who can’t create their own joy. They see yours. They want it. They covet it. And they’ll stoop to the dirtiest of tricks (like calling you their “angel” and “the one” and “the love of their life”) to get it.

Be careful of those charismatic liars who smile at everything you say and agree with all of your philosophies upon first meeting you.

Ask them, “What do you think? What’s your opinion?”

If they repeatedly smile and repeat what you’ve said as their truth, remain distant. If you have to work with this person, keep it professional. Don’t open up yourself. Hold back. If it’s intimate, bow out gracefully as soon as you can. If its a new friendship, just stop engaging the sociopath.

Regardless of the relationship’s nature, once you distance yourself from the sociopath, you close the door on their influence, ultimately protecting yourself from potential danger.

Peace! Namaste!
~Paula

© 2013 Paula Carrasquillo and Paula’s Pontifications.

46 responses to “Sociopaths Will Ruin Your Happiness Just by Being in Your Life”

  1. Sam Avatar
    Sam

    Well, what can I say. I have lived it and just got the guts to finally closed the chapter. I am a married man with children. I met this woman who some how got me into her. On the very first date, we were making out and soon end up having sex, but something was odd about her. After 10 months of on and off dating, I finally called it off. Well, next thing I know she comes back with a lot of expensive gifts and somehow I fell again. The next 8 months was anything but Heaven. Money, vacation, great sex, you name it. She got my cut off from everyone, even my children. I was spending all the time with her and she had no problem paying. But I always felt she is lying about herself, where she is going etc. She was bragging about being some famous designer and making lot of money and I fell for it. She was showing off. She did not have problem about me being married and she was always saying, your wife first and then me and I was like Wooo this is a great sitting. In late August 2014, she wanted to use my account to do some wire transfer, at first I agreed but then I had second thoughts and froze my account. Things changed, I guess as she found out that the accounts were frozen, she dumped me and I went after her and she is like “who cares”. I was stunned but I thought I am in so much love and I begged her to be with me. We did end up together but she was one cold person. She kept bringing the past to me and the bad things I have done to her. By Jan 2015, she again wanted me to help with her money and she became so nice again and as that did not happened, he real face showed up again. She never took the blame, every time I caught her lying she would fight me back and tell me that she will leave me and I was so stupid that I kept going back. She cut me from all my friends. I finally learned about a sociopath and I matched her with this behavior and I closed my door. It is been horrible and I feel like I lost so much time with my family.

    Like

    1. Paula Avatar

      Thank you, Sam. Don’t give up and don’t focus on the time you think you lost with your family. The experience with his woman opened your mind to the difference between false love and real love. You and your family will benefit from this knowledge despite not being able to see the benefits today. 🙂

      Like

  2. Sam Avatar
    Sam

    I ended up living with two of these vampire like sociopathic creatures. One being my sister who brought with her a boyfriend who was her equal in all the wrong ways. Before long they pull you into their crazy world and make everything your fault. In the process I almost lost everything, including my mind.

    Now that over a year has passed, I’ve been able to reflect on my entire life and move forward. I’ve now realised how many of these joyless dark souls I’ve dealt with in my life. Right now I’m mentally and physically the strongest I’ve ever been, so I’ve turned the whole thing into a positive.

    Good luck everyone and remember when you meet these creeps, give them no emotions, no information and none of your time.

    Like

  3. Sta Avatar
    Sta

    I agree that female sociopaths are the most dangerous. My boyfriend’s ex wife is one and no one, including the court system seems to take it seriously. She stalks, she harasses, she lies. He finally managed to get a restraining order and she violated it countless times. He went back for a 6 month return date and she lied under oath that she was the one being victimized, that he had been sleeping with her and it got dropped!! DROPPED! Based upon her word only. The scary part is she picked the two nights that she knew he was home alone with no alibi, so she clearly watches him. I have a harassment prevention order against her and she is very careful to violate it without actually violating it. She will send packages to my house with another return address and won’t sign letter so when I bring to police they say they can’t do anything. I have installed a security system in my house. She is relentless. Scary, scary stuff. When will people start understanding that women sociopaths are just as bad if not worse? If the genders were reversed and she were a man doing this to an ex wife he would be in JAIL.

    Like

  4. Adrian Avatar
    Adrian

    My sociopath was a female, and I cannot stress how dangerous a female sociopath is. Unlike men, who are perceived by society to be the evil doers, abusers, killers, and rapists, females have no negative social stigma. People view them as nurturers, caretakers, mothers, and ideal candidates for any position involving trust. I.E. How many of you would hire a male nanny? Females by default are more trusted, and thusly FAR more dangerous when they lack remorse and conscience.

    I encountered THE most evil and dangerous kind of sociopath that exists on this earth, in regards to emotional destruction. She was in appearances, HIGHLY religious, and as a muslim she wore a face veil. Imagine that! The evil creatures that wear a mask of you in order to prey upon you, actually wearing a PHYSICAL mask that is interpreted as acceptable, because its religiously based. It is a brilliant strategy, actually. She could be baring her teeth at you while talking to you under that face veil and you’d never know it. Scary.

    We went through the sociopathic three step phase. Worship, devalue, discard. At first she wrote me beautiful poetry and agreed with nearly everything I said, mirroring me. She convinced me that she was my soul mate. She worshipped every single thing I said and did, and conformed to every requirement I had, even though my requirements were quite high. However, her mask would often slip during the relationship when she would say something that completely went against something shed agreed with before, and she hastily scrambled to cover it up. I never realized because I didn’t know what she was.

    She would often shift between blissful happiness and horrible attitude in literally the blink of an eye. She would be laughing as she left our bed at some joke we’d shared and then shed come back 5 minutes later in a horrible, deadened mood with coldness that killed the soul. When asked what was wrong she would say “nothing, its not realistic to be happy all of the time.” This was the beginning of the devalue stage. Where before I was the greatest person with the greatest character she had ever met, I became a highly flawed person who was worse than even the lowest peice of dung on the earth.Realistically, no human can both be the greatest person alive, and the most worthless person alive, so I should’ve known something was up , but I didnt know what she was.

    She eventually left me for good once I found out that she had been having an affair with another man. She showed no remorse, no apology, and in fact criticized me for finding out. At that point, she realized that her mask was revealed, and promptly ended all contact and relationship with me, showing 0% love where before it had been 200% love.

    I warn everyone out there…. when you meet a woman who claims to be everything that you are, agrees with everything that you say, shares all of your same views, and bombards you with compliments, love and affection…. run. Real humans do not work that way, which is why we feel so unbelievably lucky that we found that person. They are not humans, rather a sub-human species of parasite, that is both evil, and perverse. They feast upon happiness, emotions, and chaos, and care nothing about you….

    I hope this helps someone.

    Like

    1. Paula Avatar

      Adrian, Thank you for sharing this experience with us. I’ve wrangled with a few female sociopaths in friendships and in business. I can’t imagine how devastating it would be to be in a romantic relationship with one for the very reasons you list that make them so much harder to detect. I hope you’re doing well today.

      Like

    2. Nick Avatar
      Nick

      Everyone I got the worst kind of sociopath, mixed with bipolar sadistic / narcissist . Im just glad im not crazy . I lost everything .

      Im so miserable I dont even want to go on with this rant..please everyone keep spreading the awareness on these monsters!

      Please keep spreading your horror stories so people can realize they are real and do it on purpose sociopaths are way past (they have a mental issue) Dont ever , ever, feel sorry for them .

      Liked by 1 person

    3. Ellen Marie Jensen Avatar

      So, so helpful. I will share my story here soon. Thank you to the author of this blog!

      Like

  5. Darla Avatar
    Darla

    I am so depressed and feel like giving up on life. I saw my ex spath last night at a dance club. Everything was fine as long as his other supply was there. He was so sweet and danced and laughed with me and the other supply. THEN…when the supply left he totally ignored me. Would disappear and would come back, but would not dance with me anymore and looked bored and frustrated. I hate it that he still has an effect on me. When I got ready to leave he said he was still upset from the last fight we had when I called him out on his lies. Then after all the insults he threw at me and said he wanted me out of his life, he switched and said he was sorry and wanted to start on a clean and fresh slate with our friendship. He then kissed me and said I was a beautiful woman. I woke up this morning wanting to die. I feel physically, mentally, and spiritually sick and defeated. I have no friends and my family has abandoned me and won’t talk to me anymore. I keep looking for a reason to go on but feel completely hopeless.

    Like

    1. Paula Avatar

      Darla, you feel sick and devastated because you’re faced with a reality you refuse to accept: that not everyone has good inside of them and that there are simply some people who find joy in controlling, manipulating and watching others be destroyed. You’ve been placed at this point of awareness for a reason. You are destined to move beyond this new discovery and make your life better than it ever was before. But it takes work and much self-reflection and the patience to deconstruct how we allowed it to happen in the first place…and I don’t mean finding a weakness that needs to be changed. I’m talking about discovering that you have strengths you’ve been hiding all because you were looking for this person to validate you instead of finding peace in the simple act of validating yourself. You donot need this ugly person’s approval to feel worthy and accepted and valued.

      Like

  6.  Avatar
    Anonymous

    I had a lady friend 23 years ago while at university. Best sfriend so I thought who was engaged . I was an innocent girl who fell in love with o a charming gentleman, the best I ever met. My sociopath friend set her eyes on this msn, 4 years younger yhan herlf.n. Worked hard to separate me and the love of my life, rejoiced at her achievement. Being naive and in love for the first time, thought she was truthful and offering good advice. She used to take money gifts , chocolate from my boyfriend and tear all the love notes my fiancee wrote and tell him I don’t like him I tore the letters myself etc. Sadly I got to know the truth 13 years after the love of myself died. Shocked at her cruelty just realised I let a sociopath into my life. Struggling with forgiveness but relived I know who she is. Sad I didn’t have a chance to share and have kids with the love of my life.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. cynthia Avatar
    cynthia

    Your welcome Paula. I grew up with my sister being a Sociopathso OI am kinda eeducatedon this since I aoent 14 years of my life with her in the same household. 14 years of Hell! GGenerally speaking, Sociopaths are not evil. They seem.evil because they have no conscience. Most are burnouts. This is very true. You never see it coming. But there are always red flags, yet being the naive people we are who are not Sociopathic/Psychopathic, we just ignore them usually. And when you do finally realise what’s really going on, and see the path for who they really are, its all too late. You are trapped in the web the path created and weaved together oh so cleverly. And once they get to your friends and family, its all over, you don’t stand a chance, really. You see, the path has been doing this for YEARS, most likely since they were children. They will get everybody to feel sorry for them and they will play the “wounded hero”, telling you how they were done wrong in the past and blah, blah, blah. Feeding you these tragic stories about their abusive chilhood and horrible family. When in reality their family cut them off because of the drama, chaos and pain they caused on their relitives. Then once you see them without the mask, it all makes sense. The people who the path claims did them wrong were probably giving them exactly what they deserved! THERE ARE TWO SIDES TO EVERY STORY, remember that when dealing with people in general. When people tell you sad stories about their past trials and tribulations, make sure they have proof, if not don’t believe a word of it. Doing this will save you from being duped more than other people who meet the path. Sad but true. In the end of it all, once they get bored or exposed and their true form is seen by everybody in the social circle, they simply vanish, like they never even existed! They move on to the next group of people who don’t know any of the former victims of the path. It’s really tragic when people who have worked so hard for their place in the world to make their dreams come true, then one day the path comes along and destroys it all just like that, ruining your once respected reputation, and making you out to be the bad guy. Its devastating, its sick, its twisted, its sad and they will never change. Best thing you could do is just not to pick up any of the broken peices. Just leave it there, take a good look at it, and walk away empty handed, humbled and defeated. Its painful but that’s life. Accept the fact that there is no looking back or fixing any of it. Simply move on, disappear forever and take it from there. And when I mean dissapear, I mean literally dissapear for good. No contact with ANYONE. Period! And try to start all over again with a clean, honest and fresh plate. That’s all you can really do. In a sense, that is winning. The path will never get to you again, they can trash talk you ALL they want but it will never get back to you. They can’t get to you, they don’t know where you are and never will, and knowing that pisses them off. That’s the best revenge, don’t feed the fire…just ignore it and let it burn itself out. In ten years from now, nobody will even remember half of it, or care. Wounds will heal in time, I promise, Godbless.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. dav Avatar
      dav

      Great post. I did not see it coming and I was involved thinking this person was a friend from all the special things that was tolled to me. You are also correct that we work hard in life to make thing happen and they look for a target to take it. They don’t or cant work for it. My Sociopath cheats and cones to get what he wants. I waked away with nothing.

      Like

    2. Paula Avatar

      It saddens me so much to learn of your experience. But we are resourceful, and most of all, we love and value life and can overcome. 🙂

      Like

  8. cynthia Avatar
    cynthia

    This is very good, but not all accurate. My sister was a Sociopath. Being very charmng and agreeing with people’s opinions does not make them a Sociopath. Sociopaths will befriend you. Then once you introduce them to family and friends, thats when the game begins. Sociopaths will try and take your place. They want to be you…and in orderto be you, they have to destroy you. And turn everyone against you very slowly.

    Like

    1. Paula Avatar

      Great points, Cynthia! Thank you for adding your insight. ~Paula

      Like

    2. dav Avatar
      dav

      True, Sociopath do want to be you. Mine befriended me as well and ruined my life for about ten years to get what he wanted.

      Like

    3. Paula Avatar

      But you’re free now, right? They will never apologize or even consider what they’ve done. We must accept. Once we do, life opens up to us again and we return to ourselves better and more loving than before. 🙂

      Like

  9. Bonny Avatar
    Bonny

    Wow. I’ve been out of an abusive relationship for seven years, and have suffered guilt, shame, self-hatred, confusion, flashbacks, and what I think is PTSD. It has helped me to read all this. I thought I was crazy, since he told me I was. It seems that he was/is typical. I had no idea while all this was going on, that he was abusive. I was totally drawn in and thought that if I’d just be better, or whatever, that he would be happier with me. He said I was the stupid one, the one who didn’t think before she acted, the one who was “silly”. I felt he really dispised me. But reading this, it makes me think that he was the one with the problem. He really did a job on me. I think that I’m going to be o.k., but I still have a lot of work to do. Thank you all.

    Like

    1. Nor Avatar
      Nor

      Having know about this guy, I can tell you that he is the perfect serpentine slithering through people’s lives.

      Like

  10. rita, john poluchuck Avatar
    rita, john poluchuck

    We have been through this with a neighbor it was horrible he tried to take every piece of our lives off of us. the stress and sadness he caused was horrible. he told lies about us, tried to break our marriage up. had kids from the neighborhood harassing us. he was trying to drive us insane. we almost took a nervous breakdown from it. we finally got up and moved. the pain is finally starting to go away. we just watch out for him because he is obsessed with us. now we just keep reporting it to the cops so its on record.

    Like

    1. Paula Avatar

      They’re despicable people! My ex, the boy in my story, was always nosey about the neighbors and what they were doing or up to. It never made else to me. Big busy body who had nothing better to do than to devalue EVERYONE because he was such a loser. Just like your neighbor.

      Like

    2. rita, john poluchuck Avatar
      rita, john poluchuck

      you are so right Paula, our neighbor was in everybody’s business and he had every neighbor fighting with each other. it was terrible. Thank you for your comment.

      Like

  11. Bee Avatar
    Bee

    “They are shit people who can’t create their own joy. They see yours.”

    So very true. 6 years ago I was a very bubbly person who was surrounded by friends I had known forever & loved life. A year and so after – I didn’t even know myself anymore.

    I remember looking a pictures BEFORE I met him of my genuine smile & happiness and whoa, after – broken. They truly are shit people. Fast forward to now – I am definitely away from that.You’ll get stronger and stronger every day for those who are still trying to move forward.

    Like

    1. Bonny Avatar
      Bonny

      I agree, Bee. I know what you mean about looking at the photos. Not long ago my Mother told me that she was so glad to have her daughter back.

      I’ve been out about eight years now, and I get a little stronger every day. When it’s fresh, it seems that you will never be “right” again. I know I felt such deep depression that it almost killed me. It’s a tremendously hard road, but you have to keep living every day, and know that it will get better.

      Like

  12. […] Sociopaths Will Ruin Your Happiness Just by Being in Your Life (paularenee.wordpress.com) […]

    Like

  13. Higgs Avatar
    Higgs

    Never let a sociopath know anything about you. They’ll use your weakness against you. Female sociopaths are the worst. You have to be very careful how you approach them. She ruined my entire life and told me that she would do so if I ever left her. Now, she told all these lies to the church that I go to for counseling from her torment. Completely cut off contact with anyone that knows them. They have no conscience and they will never stop. I can’t believe that I trusted and helped this person. I feel sad for her kids as I witnessed constant abuse of them at her hands.

    Like

    1. Paula Avatar

      I am very sorry you are going through this, Higgs. Their lack of conscience becomes truly apparent when we attempt to defend ourselves and expose their abuses. It’s almost better just to allow them to sink themselves, because they will. They ultimately lose, but we don’t need to wait around for that to happen. Good luck to you and remain strong and hopeful! Namaste!

      Like

  14. Sara Avatar

    Hi Paula, thanks for your latest comment ….. and MY hand is raised without shame too! Still busy ‘tweaking’ my blog and will hopefully be ready to click the ‘publish’ button very soon. You know, I have a degree in English and Journalism and yet this is something I still seem to have a problem with. Sometimes I cannot for the life of me manage to string 2 sentences together properly. My spelling is ok but Syntax? Gone! This ‘getting back to being me’ and getting back in touch with my creative side is something I’m still battling with. My brain still feels as though it’s missing a huge chunk (feels a bit like having dementia perhaps?) ….. Nonetheless, I know that this too will pass. It’s just another ‘after symptom’ of being in a Psychopathic relationship. ((HUGS)) x

    Like

    1. Paula Avatar

      With time, patience and practice, all will return. I promise! And it will return even better than you imagined. ❤

      Like

  15. Isabelle Avatar
    Isabelle

    I’m going on month six of being away from my sociopathic ex. Over the past six months I’ve been astounded at just how numb, lost, and generally “gone” I became during that relationship. I’ve slowly been coming back into myself and remembering what it is to feel, to laugh, to enjoy, to breathe, to just BE. I could do none of those things when I was with my ex.

    The most maddening part about being with him was that he always insisted that everything was fine and perfect, in our relationship as well as in his life, when it clearly was not. He would twist the truth and rewrite history to suit HIS needs, so that nothing was ever actually worked out or solved. A solution that we reached one night would be completely irrelevant the next night. Over time it became very obvious to me that all he really cared about was getting and maintaining control. THAT is why he would never really put any effort into working out our problems, problems that could’ve been easily fixed had he just simply tried. But trying would have meant relinquishing control, and oh no, he couldn’t do that.

    He had an agenda throughout our entire relationship, I see that now, and that is why I perpetually felt this sense of something being very WRONG, although at the time I couldn’t quite put my finger on it. The red flags were there, but part of me didn’t want to see the truth because I so wanted things to be fantasy-like, like they had been in the beginning. But now, I’m out, and I’m BACK – 20 pounds lighter in body and a million pounds lighter in spirit 🙂

    Like

    1. Paula Avatar

      Isabelle, I am so happy for you! It sounds like we dated the same person! Haha! And I understand the numbness you describe. I was there. I was very numb and dumbfounded, too. (I can’t claim to have become un-numb as quickly as you, however. It took me about 10 months after escaping to really begin to feel lighter.) Stay strong and powerful! Namaste! 🙂

      Like

    2. Sara Avatar

      Hi Isabelle, I wish you lots of happiness and I’m so pleased you’ve realised who this person truly is and you’ve left him to his own misery. Just a word of advice…. when I first realised that I’d been involved with a Sociopath, I felt relief that it was over with, relief that it wasn’t ME with the problem, but HIM ….. just so much relief….. sadly, those feelings only lasted for a very short while (perhaps a week or so at best) – and I went from feeling relief to feeling extremely unwell (I was suffering from PTSD although I didn’t know that then) – so if in the near future you do start to feel unwell (flash-backs, physical pain, feeling numb and unable to cope with everyday life) please don’t worry. It’s a normal reaction to an abnormal situation you’ve been in. I really do hope this won’t happen to you (and forgive me if I’ve scared you) but having spoken with other survivors of narcissistic abuse, we’ve all experienced initial relief, only to then suffer from PTSD ….. and other stages, i.e. anger (still a biggie for me, the anger)! Wishing you well, Sara x

      Like

    3. Paula Avatar

      Ah, yes, Sara. We must remain mindful of how we are feeling and always be open to asking for help when and if we begin feeling less than positive in the aftermath. It creeps in, on occasion and sometimes often, for most of us. ❤

      Like

    4.  Avatar
      Anonymous

      I will say that I’m not completely out of the woods yet. Being with my ex triggered a lot of “old stuff” for me – the very stuff that made me vulnerable to a person like him in the first place – and I am still in the process of wading through that very painful stuff. To say it’s not easy would be an enormous understatement, but at the same time I know that I have to work through it in order to come out on the other end. So, I’m doing much better than I was, but I know the healing I have to do isn’t over yet.

      I can say for certain however that going through this whole experience has made me a heck of a lot stronger as a person, in ways that I couldn’t have even imagined. It’s funny how you surprise yourself with your strength when someone is trying to take and annihilate everything that you ARE. I didn’t know what anger really was until I was with my ex. The thing about sociopaths – which is what makes them so horribly dangerous – is that they WILL cross any and all boundaries and WILL try to steal your soul, without blinking an eye. Where normal people will stop, sociopaths just keep going. It’s the rage-driven desire to own, to dominate, and to destroy that makes these predators nothing less than lethal to the mind, body, and spirit of others. And unless you’ve been through it first-hand, you don’t really believe a person could be like that. But as we, here, know, they’re out there.

      Like

    5. Paula Avatar

      Yes, yes, yes!!! They push us to the limit. We’re forced to take a deep look into ourselves and deconstruct our issues. We eventually come out much better and stronger!! It’s the hidden gift sociopaths provide to us. At the threshold of their abuse, there are two directions we can go: down the stairs or up. We really do have a choice despite initially feeling broken and pathetic and utterly destroyed spiritually. 🙂 ❤

      Like

    6. Bonny Avatar
      Bonny

      Isabelle, what you went through is eerily similar to my history with my ex. I truly understand your statement, “I’ve slowly been coming back into myself and remembering what it is to feel, to laugh, to enjoy, to breathe, to just BE. I could do none of those things when I was with my ex.” So glad your are out and getting stronger!

      Like

  16. Sara Avatar

    As always, you’ve hit the nail on the head Paula! I know for a fact that HE contacted all of his exes again when Friends Reunited / Facebook came about although he told me they’d been the ones who re-established contact (more lies)….. and I think you’re right …. I think sooner or later, he would have found me! What I don’t understand is why his ‘main player’ isn’t upset with him being friends with all his exes on facebook? (with the exception of ME…. I was never added as a friend, most likely because he’d already decided I would be his next victim….) I wouldn’t like it one bit and not because I’d feel jealous – it’s just that I’d find it creepy! Maybe it’s true what I read somewhere…. that Narcissists never really let go of their exes.

    According to HIM, after finally admitting that it HAD only been an affair and I’d let him get away with it all, he had the cheek to say “We still have a connection hun and if we ever saw each other again, it would happen again”…. As you said Paula, they are INCAPABLE of acknowledging any wrong-doing on THEIR part and they really do believe they are the ones being victimised by US (the abused is accused of being the abuser)!

    It would be interesting to find out just how many of us have had their names held on record with the police for ‘harassment’ by their abuser (and their enablers).

    Namaste ❤

    Like

    1. Paula Avatar

      I would gather that every single victim/survivor who has ever stood up for herself/himself against these fools has been accused, arrested or granted peace orders against them for the narc/sociopath’s perception of our inquisition as harassment. My hand is raised…without shame!

      Like

  17. sakuraandme Avatar

    Oh No!
    That’s so scary. I’m onto now, thank you. Recently being single I’ve actually encountered this a fair bit. Lucky for me it all felt a little wrong. Hugs and nite from Oz, Paula xxx

    Like

    1. Paula Avatar

      Hugs! Nice to see you! 🙂

      Like

    2. sakuraandme Avatar

      Thank you. Have a great weekend. hugs xxx

      Like

  18. Sara Avatar

    Unfortunately, I’m the one who contacted the Sociopath after 22 years. I had no idea at the tender age of 20 (he was 21) that he was indeed a Sociopath. After we split (due to my ‘apparent’ bad temper, antagonistic personality and lack of trust in him) and I told him I’d been googling and was now convinced he has a Narcissistic Personality Disorder and that he deliberately targeted me, he told me that I was the one who contacted him after many years. In other words, it was MY fault. They are pathetic little creeps who create chaos and drama wherever they go! You’re right Paula – Sociopaths ruin us just by interjecting themselves into our lives. They’re evil. They hate us because we are everything they aren’t. They want what we have and that’s why they set out to destroy us. Well, my little pathetic sociopath FAILED. He failed to destroy me! And I told him exactly that. Killer words to a narcissistic sociopath. Good. And good riddance!

    Like

    1. Paula Avatar

      Sara, They will never admit to any wrong doing. You know why I think that is? Because they feel like they are the victims of us!! They feel victimized by our questions and our inability to go along with everything they say and do. If we don’t like it, we can just leave, right?!?! Haha! Every time we try to leave, then they backpedal and give us their pitiful apologies and promise never to do “that” again. But they don’t understand that the “that” is at their core. It’s called control and manipulation. No matter how good their mask is in the beginning and no matter how tightly it appears to remain in place for many months or even years, it slips. It slips because no two people can always agree 100% on each and every aspect of our lives. And that’s how to drive a sociopath crazy. Just disagree with him. They’re truly impish children beneath it all. They have zero coping skills and can’t help themselves if their lives depended on it. That’s why they NEED us. So even if you hadn’t reached out to that jackass yourself, he would have reached out to you eventually. It’s how I got re involved with the sociopath, the boy in my story. He and I had worked and briefly dated years before. He was younger than me and I chalked up his seriously immature behavior to just being young and inexperienced. I thought maybe he had grown in those 6 years (I know. That’s not very long.) But was I ever wrong!!! I was right the first time I dumped his ass. I never should have responded to his email 6 years later. Uuugghh!

      Like

  19. C. Avatar
    C.

    Brilliant advice. If only I had known…

    Like

    1. Paula Avatar

      Hehe! If only ANY of us had known. But now we know a little more than before. ❤

      Like